Roger Ebert gave the film two stars.
Excerpts praise the Gotham City design as distinctive and atmospheric but regret that nothing more memorable happens there.
The review calls the Joker the most important character in impact and screen time and finds Keaton’s Batman and Bruce Wayne so monosyllabic and impenetrable that viewers must remind themselves to cheer.
The review calls it a hostile, mean-spirited movie about ugly, evil people, lacking the euphoria of Superman or Indiana Jones, and not for kids despite its rating.
The review feels like one and a half stars, likely bumped to two for the look; Ebert also disliked the sequel.
A rebuttal says Ebert missed the point about design and character psychology, and that a nighttime parade whose giant balloons poison the city is memorable.
Ebert is described as a plot and story guy, and the story comes and goes here.

Picking Nits

Bell tower geometry; unrevealed Batcave entrance; obvious secret identity; cathedral origin; Vicki’s weight; comic departures; unintimidating goons; chemical plant security; newscaster boils

In the discussion (12)

Approx. transcript time · 00:40:44Read transcript

The bell tower fall geometry, with the Joker pulling them over without falling, is a huge nitpick.
The goons are not intimidating, a point deferred to picking nits.
Vicki walking into the Batcave to find Bruce is Batman has no reveal or payoff; Burton reportedly stated in 1992 he was killed for it, said he went too far, and called it a mistake.
Batman revealing his identity in the first movie is an odd choice.
Nobody recognizes the same jawline and eyes under the mask; Superman’s glasses are worse.
The cathedral reportedly came from Peters and Nicholson seeing Phantom of the Opera; it also echoes Vertigo.
Vicki states her weight as 108 pounds though the actress is about 5’10”.
Comic fans objected to the Joker killing the Waynes instead of Joe Chill, to naming him Jack Napier, and to Alfred letting Vicki into the Batcave.
Fan outrage is discussed as possibly beginning here, with jokes about listener complaints over the previous month.
The Joker’s gang would intimidate no one, looking like bouncers at Planet Hollywood.
The chemical plant needed better security.
Newscasters developing boils within days of giving up tainted beauty products is implausible.

Recasting Couch

Phil Hartman as Knox; Morgan Freeman as Harvey Dent

In the discussion (4)

Approx. transcript time · 00:49:37Read transcript

Morgan Freeman is proposed as Harvey Dent, who could return for the sequel; whether he would make a good Two-Face is disputed.
A bigger actor is wanted for the Knox role; Robin Williams is floated and Daniel Day-Lewis is joked about.
Phil Hartman is the recasting-couch pick for Knox.
The recap asks for literally any actor other than the Knox actor, listing Daniel Day-Lewis and Phil Hartman for Knox and Morgan Freeman as Harvey Dent.

Casting What-Ifs

Batman contenders; Joker alternatives; Vicki Vale recasting; Grissom refusal; Adam West

In the discussion (13)

Approx. transcript time · 00:52:10Read transcript

Casting what-ifs are deferred past the break; the film is said to have as many as any of the 226 editions, rivaling The Godfather.
Nearly every 1980s star was reportedly considered for Batman, including Mel Gibson, Kevin Costner, Charlie Sheen, Tom Selleck, Bill Murray, Harrison Ford, and one further name garbled in the transcript, with uncertainty over what is real.
Pierce Brosnan reportedly met Burton but did not want to play a comic-book hero.
Bill Murray, with Ivan Reitman directing, was earlier buzz that Peters favored for years; the hosts are glad it did not happen. An Eddie Murphy as Robin rumor is doubted.
Damon Wayans, met by chance, reportedly denied the research claim that he and Bruce Willis feuded on The Last Boy Scout, illustrating the unreliability of casting research.
Nicholson was reportedly the studio’s top Joker choice since 1980, and Willem Dafoe reportedly stated in 2009 he had been in talks.
Robin Williams was reportedly offered the Joker to pressure Nicholson, released once Nicholson agreed, and then refused Warner roles such as the Riddler without an apology; the apology detail is doubted.
Dead Poets Society was 1989’s third-biggest film; swapping Nicholson and Williams would make both films worse, and “he stole my balloons” is called a favorite line.
Nicholson’s reported conditions included top billing, a share of earnings including merchandise, capped work hours, and no work on Lakers home playoff games; his fee dropped from $11 million to $6 million, but he may have made $90 million.
Martin Landau reportedly turned down Carl Grissom for Crimes and Misdemeanors, and Jack Palance in that role is imagined as bad.
Sean Young was cast as Vicki Vale and replaced after a horse-riding injury; the Knox actor later claimed she sabotaged a read-through, which is doubted. Her Catwoman costume audition for Batman Returns is recalled.
The Knox actor also claimed Keaton blocked Peters’ choice of Michelle Pfeiffer because they had dated, which is doubted since she is in the sequel.
Adam West was publicly disappointed not to be asked to reprise Batman.

Half-Assed Internet Research

Costs, Pinewood secrecy, Palance clash, makeup time, body count, Aspen horseback ride

In the discussion (5)

Approx. transcript time · 01:06:32Read transcript

The Batman suit reportedly cost $250,000 and the 38-foot cathedral $100,000; filming at Pinewood Studios in England kept Nicholson’s Joker secret.
Palance reportedly had a hearing problem; after Burton cut a take he missed, Palance boasted of making over 100 films, and Burton later called it a scarring experience.
Nicholson’s Joker makeup took two hours, and Keaton reportedly recalls that basketball games were taped on VHS for him to watch in the chair.
The film has 56 dead bodies.
To win over Nicholson, Burton was taken horseback riding with him in Aspen despite not riding horses.

Probably Unanswerable Questions

Nicholson’s most important role; the Dr. J theory of Batmen; most disappointing Batman

In the discussion (5)

Approx. transcript time · 01:18:38Read transcript

Whether this was secretly Nicholson’s most important movie is recalled as already discussed.
Dr. J theory: Keaton’s Batman is Dr. J, Bale’s is Michael Jordan, and the Reeves films start a LeBron era; Keaton invented the low Batman voice, and Dr. J was not bad for basketball. — Sean Fennessey
Clooney is the most disappointing Batman, saddled with the worst film; he might have been good with a better director.
More comparisons follow: Val Kilmer as Hakeem Olajuwon, Affleck as Karl Malone or Kawhi Leonard, Zoe Kravitz as the Steph Curry, Adam West as Paul Arizin, and Cesar Romero as George Mikan.
Julie Newmar’s Catwoman and Burgess Meredith’s Penguin are remembered from the TV show, and the 1966 movie featured all the villains.

Producer review

Nicholson as disengaged scene-stealer; parody-like tone

In the discussion (5)

Approx. transcript time · 01:23:50Read transcript

The producer was born long after the film and watched The Batman about 24 hours before this one.
Nicholson is scene-stealing and charismatic but seems to do every scene in one take without caring.
The film looks like a Scary Movie-style parody of today’s serious Batman, especially the museum dance to Prince.
The hosts counter that its lack of self-seriousness is what makes it fun; the producer assumed Batman was always serious and dark.
A mock question about a Jerry Seinfeld Batman sitcom is quickly revealed as a joke.