Unanswerable: how directly John Wick borrowed the damaged retired-assassin manner from Creasy, despite different worldbuilding. — Chris Ryan
Davante Adams's unsmiling walk after catches is jokingly compared with Creasy leaving an explosion. — Bill Simmons
Why Creasy does not kill everyone at the end is answered by his awareness that accumulated wounds are fatal; joking bleed-it-out comparisons are not medical advice. — Bill Simmons
How many fingers one could lose before confessing gets an immediate-surrender answer; portraying torture pain without parody is also questioned. — Bill Simmons
Michael Mann gets a yes from two voices ('I would go yes. Me too.'); the diner gets a yes; L.A. bank robbery movies get a yes. — Bill Simmons
Not Pacino overall, but over-the-top late-prime Pacino: everything from Sea of Love on is Apex Mountain, and he is better in Heat than in Scent of a Woman. — Bill Simmons
The late-prime run is listed as Glengarry, Scent of a Woman, Carlito's Way, Heat, City Hall, Donnie Brasco, Devil's Advocate, The Insider and Any Given Sunday, whose speech is also iconic. — Bill Simmons
Not Val Kilmer's Apex, which is placed earlier around Tombstone; by Dr. Moreau the wheels come off, but it all starts here. — Bill Simmons
The Eady actress is proposed as absolutely Apex (NYPD Blue then Heat, leading to Judging Amy) but is vetoed. — Bill Simmons
Character actor Voight: yes, as the start of his character-actor journey and a favorite Voight performance. — Bill Simmons
Tom Sizemore: Saving Private Ryan may be a more developed role, though Heat plus Ryan is a nice mid-90s run. — Chris Ryan
Quite a few actresses wished they had gotten Allie; Jessica Biel is the most vocal, having called it in an interview the film that got away, though one host no longer acknowledges Jessica Biel.
Britney Spears would have been terrible, and with Justin Timberlake rumored as Noah a Justin-and-Britney Notebook was probably considered; she is a really bad actress who has never had chemistry with anyone, said with respect; Reese Witherspoon may not be a true rumor, and Ashley Judd would have been too old.
Timberlake is not a good actor but fun in The Social Network; he later worked with Nick Cassavetes in Alpha Dog with Emile Hirsch, a time capsule of 2006 that nobody saw.
Steven Spielberg apparently wanted to direct this with Tom Cruise starring, which prompts a wish to ask Spielberg what attracted him, with the war part the guess, and a joke that Kevin Connolly would have fared better; the timing is first placed right after Jerry Maguire, then corrected to around 2002, after Eyes Wide Shut and the Nicole divorce, coming off Minority Report and Vanilla Sky.
Cruise's Noah would be a different take that would not make the movie work, though possibly accurate to the script, and not the romantic movie we know; the what-ifs are fun because where they landed is so perfect, Gosling was famously cast first, and a DVD extra shows McAdams coming in for her read looking even younger.
Affleck and Hauser were cast over Vince Vaughn, the runner-up for both parts: he lost to Affleck first and was going to get the Hauser part until Linklater worried he looked too much like Affleck and the two would be confused.
Renee Zellweger auditioned for Parker Posey's part and did not get it; Claire Danes did not get Sabrina because she looked too young, though she is a better actor than the woman who got the role; Ashley Judd did not get Jodie and two years later played Val Kilmer's wife in Heat.
The casting names are called almost more fun than Titanic's, which the same three hosts covered two weeks earlier, because people did not want to own up to passing on Titanic; Reese Witherspoon and Sarah Michelle Gellar were both up for Cher, the Gellar name recalled through Cruel Intentions.
A tangent: Cruel Intentions came a couple of years later, Clueless is a G rated movie by comparison, and one host cannot believe their parents let them watch Cruel Intentions all the time.
Paul Rudd, who played Josh, apparently wanted to be Christian or Murray; the hosts could see him as Christian but are glad he did not do it, and one was deep in Paul Rudd fandom in the nineties through the show Sisters, where he was Swoozie Kurtz's son-in-law married to Ashley Judd's character (names as transcribed).
Clueless and Paris in Romeo and Juliet are called the peak Paul Rudd run for one host, who says he never gets enough credit for sustained relevance but will never matter more than he did then.
The best what-if is Jeremy Renner being up for Christian, which the host thinks he turned down; the hosts can see it and wonder whether his career would have looked different, joking about his status in the Marvel movies.
More names in the mix: Terrence Howard for Murray, Lauryn Hill for Dion (she was acting then, as in Sister Act), Owen Wilson trying out for Travis, Leah Remini auditioning for Ty, and Zooey Deschanel up for both Amber and Cher; a Deschanel Cher is agreed to be a very different and worse movie.
Never fall for a guy who courts you by asking why you care what he reads and does; never fall for a guy with no furniture; don't call anyone slick during an armored-truck robbery; never leave a living witness; don't sell stolen bearer bonds back to the criminal you took them from; 'the bank is worth the risk' and 'the action is the juice' are not reasons to rob a bank; don't wait in the car when your criminal boyfriend disappears into a hotel that police then surround; don't let word get out that it's okay to steal your stuff; if it rains, you get wet; a life that revolves around barbecue and ballgames sucks; have nothing you can't walk away from in 30 seconds if you spot the heat around the corner
The lessons segment opens with a minor lesson: never fall for a guy who starts courting you by asking why you are so interested in what he reads and does; walk away, since he is not making himself emotionally available. Edie, lonely as a graphic designer from Kentucky working in Santa Monica, still hits it off with Neil, who answers 'I am alone. I am not lonely' and talks about going to Tahiti.
Major lesson number one, which the speaker hopes a daughter will remember someday: never fall for a guy with no furniture. Asked whether that is worse than falling for a man with a debilitating gambling habit like Val Kilmer's character, the answer is that gambling is at least something, while a man with no furniture could be gone tomorrow; the hosts then imagine Ashley Judd's character hearing the robbery money went to debts and a Super Bowl loss.
Lesson: when robbing an armored truck, don't call anyone slick; if nobody says it, the crew is never caught. The one unbelievable thing is how the case hangs on the word: running it through the database should return the phone book, yet it is said again later and catches Sizemore's character, the kind of reach these movies always have.
Lesson: never leave a living witness, rather than taking out most of them; the witness problem is what gets Wingro (as transcribed) in trouble, since he kills a guy and De Niro reads it as him making a move.
Lesson: after stealing bearer bonds from a criminal, don't try to sell them back to him; the footnote added is not to do the resale in an abandoned drive-in parking lot on Sentinella (as transcribed) but somewhere more public, MacArthur Park perhaps, though that may be dangerous.
Lesson: when one crew member says the bank is worth the risk and another says 'for me, the action is the juice,' those are not good reasons to rob a bank. Val Kilmer's character also has gamblers to pay off and Charlene to win back, Neil oddly knows all about Sizemore's character's bonds and real estate, and Sizemore's ten-second beat and blinking before the line is called the greatest moment of his acting career, the clip for his obit reel.
Minor lesson that almost made the major list: don't wait patiently in the car for a criminal boyfriend who mysteriously walked into a massive hotel without warning when, ten minutes later, everyone pours out and police cars and fire engines arrive; just drive away, especially on the way to the airport.
A friend, Juliet, loves movies about women with terrible choices in men; nobody has ever had a worse choice in a man than Amy Brenneman's character, unlike Diane Venora and Al Pacino's, who fully know where they are in their lives; she watches news of the biggest bank robbery disaster, he strolls home, and she should have run.
The major lessons are then listed: never fall for a guy with no furniture; don't let word get out on the street that it's okay to steal your stuff; you know the risk, and if it rains you get wet, called a great high school senior yearbook quote and a good fortune cookie; and if you have a regular life that revolves around barbecue and ballgames, your life sucks.
The last and most famous lesson, good for anything in life: have no attachments, nothing you can't walk away from in 30 seconds if you spot the heat around the corner. It works the title into the signature quote subtly, unlike films that shoehorn it in, a Corolla (as transcribed) bit, with Face Off and Travolta cited; the film is about loyalty, and Neil should have left but stays for Val Kilmer's character when he gets shot.
The 30-second vanishing act is another reason the film could not be remade now: only the greatest criminals could pull it off, a digital footprint such as emails or a plane ticket to Phoenix would give anyone away where back then people paid in checks and cash, yet the film feels timeless rather than dated.
At the end Neil has 30 seconds to decide whether to take Brenneman's character and, unlike with Val Kilmer's, leaves her behind; asked whether he does it to keep her safe, the answer is that he decides she is a loser for still being there amid the chaos at the hotel.
Later the lesson is turned on Neil as hypocrisy: with the heat around the corner he still went back for Val Kilmer's character and his shattered clavicle instead of running with a bag of money.
