"I get older, they stay the same age"; "I only came here to do two things, kick some ass and drink some beer"; "If these are the best years of my life, remind me to kill myself"; "All right, all right, all right"; "You just got to keep on living, man"; "She was a hip, hip, hip lady"; "Wipe that face off your head, bitch"
Wooderson's line about getting older while the high school girls stay the same age was hilarious for about 20 years and is less so lately; the line about only coming to do two things, kick some ass and drink some beer, and being almost out of beer, and the great high school yearbook line about killing yourself if these are the best years of your life, are classics.
'All right, all right, all right' became the McConaughey joke for years and is still his catchphrase; Don Dawson's speech about doing the best he could, having fun, playing hard and chasing girls while stuck in this place is recited and attributed to Don, played by Sasha Jensen; the joint exchange and the keep-on-living speech with its spelled-out L.I.V.I.N. follow.
Slater's George Washington speech is played: Washington was in a cult tied to aliens, grew fields of weed at Mount Vernon and had people growing it across the country as a cash crop for the southern states, and Martha Washington had a bowl waiting when he came home, a hip, hip, hip lady; Slater's line imagining how many people are having sex at that moment is also liked, and the Martha Washington line is loved.
From 93 to 96 little movie monologues meant a lot because there was no internet yet, like Tarantino in the kitchen doing the Top Gun theory in Sleep With Me, an otherwise unremarkable Eric Stoltz movie, which felt mind-blowing, like the internet in one scene you wished was the whole movie; now the internet is full of such riffs, and the Martha Washington bit once landed as a great point.
The cult-and-aliens line is preceded by Washington being in a cult; one of the best ad libs is Parker Posey's 'Wipe that face off your head, bitch' as she wraps up the initiation, which in a making-of she traced to a badly translated Chekhov play whose line stuck with her; Don's fake punch at a kid walking past in the school hallway is a classic crazy football bully move.
The award is a tough one: McConaughey is in the movie too much to qualify, and the same goes for Don Dawson, so something more creative is wanted.
Parker Posey, in about four or five scenes, is proposed and was going to be the other host's vote; her high-pitched initiation scene is played, she is likened to Hannibal Lecter and called the answer, while Slater is ruled out as too prominent and iconic, with his long monologues, including his thoughts on George Washington's wife, saved for later.
Affleck and Hauser were cast over Vince Vaughn, the runner-up for both parts: he lost to Affleck first and was going to get the Hauser part until Linklater worried he looked too much like Affleck and the two would be confused.
Renee Zellweger auditioned for Parker Posey's part and did not get it; Claire Danes did not get Sabrina because she looked too young, though she is a better actor than the woman who got the role; Ashley Judd did not get Jodie and two years later played Val Kilmer's wife in Heat.
Parker Posey receives one final pick for making a large impact in limited time and embodying the glamorous 1990s book-editor fantasy. — Juliet Litman
Posey's sleeping-pill advice at the publishing party is singled out as a perfectly timed supporting moment. — Amanda Dobbins
Steve Zon receives the other final pick for his sad, unlucky-in-love bookstore employee and the contrast with his role in That Thing You Do. — Amanda Dobbins
The panel speculates that Hanks and Ephron's working relationship may have helped connect Steve Zon to the earlier Hanks-directed film, but does not establish the casting chain as fact. — Juliet Litman
