Picking Nits all-of-them joke/Bill top10intro but no formal ten-item ranked list: Bullock shouting racist locksmith claims within earshot, implausible recurring encounters across giant LA—Dillon/Newton, Phillippe/Howard then Cheadle brother.
Interconnected vignette films rarely work, Magnolia and Playing by Heart defended; latter cast/architecture monologue appreciation.
Nit Dillon might let assault witness die to avoid lawsuit/job loss; darker cigarette-drop murder imagined as better movie.
Nit carjacking aftermath cops fail search car for slouching Ludacris; discussion distinguishes neutralizing advancing Howard first versus searching once controlled, no full agreement on procedural timing.
Nit Cheadle collision where brother killed coincidence, rebuttal he may have been responding to scene.
Nit van keys left12hours untouched, chop-shop operator instant expertise selling trafficked people despite earlier blood-spatter caution; joking chop shops most evil.
Bullock, Fraser, L.A. race relations and undercover cops shooting each other are floated without a clear affirmative conclusion. — Bill Simmons
Howard’s 2005 with Hustle and Flow has a strong case, challenged by Empire’s first season. — Bill Simmons
Dillon is rejected; St. Christopher statues and human trafficking are floated without affirmative resolution. — Bill Simmons
Cheadle, Peña, Phillippe, Newton, Tate and Esposito are rejected; Cruel Intentions and Westworld or Mission: Impossible II are alternatives for Phillippe and Newton. — Bill Simmons
Bullock is called the original Karen, despite earlier disagreement. — Bill Simmons
A short film consisting of Ludacris’s scenes could work; the movie needs more of him.
The film is called the least effective effective anti-slavery movie: freeing trafficked people with forty dollars while stereotyping and abandoning them. — Van Lathan
The freed person viewing video-store choices prompts a question about intended symbolism and a reply about stories transforming people. — Bill Simmons
Letty's amnesia plot; the Rock's daughter; underdeveloped villain Mose Jakande; the L.A. action finale; no police response; the ending's first-time surprise; the Deckard Shaw plot
Seven items are promised, starting small: Letty's roughly two-year amnesia is questioned, with the reply that she survived a crash that almost killed her. — Bill Simmons
The Rock's daughter and the added family backstory seem unnecessary. — Bill Simmons
The villain "Moz Chikandi" (as transcribed), played by an actor called an Oscar winner on air ("Demon Hensu" as transcribed), is read from Wikipedia as a Nigerian-born mercenary; he gets no backstory or menacing scene, and a key scene may have been cut. — Bill Simmons
The actor is praised, citing In America, with a joke that he took the role and then found he was the second villain with ten minutes of screen time; this is called the least successful villain execution in the franchise. — Shea Serrano
The L.A. action ending is dark and hard to follow compared with the Fast 5 vault or the Fast 6 runway, capped by Dom jumping a car into a helicopter; it is the speaker's least favorite action ending of the first seven. — Bill Simmons
The reply's theory is that the L.A. set piece was never the real ending, only filler before the beach goodbye, which is why the movie feels different leaving the theater; the Rock with the giant gun is a highlight. — Shea Serrano
No police or fire department responds while towers and parking garages blow up downtown. — Bill Simmons
The first-time surprise of the theatrical ending has aged worst only because it cannot be repeated; how hard it was to land, and how badly it could have gone, has been forgotten. — Bill Simmons
The nominee for the winner of aged worst is the entire Deckard Shaw plot: he kills at least 20 police officers and Han, nearly kills Hobbs and Elena, and blows up Brian's house, yet the later movies accept him, as at the end of Fast 8. — Bill Simmons
Han should have been kept alongside Tyrese and Ludacris; a late-2019 full rewatch and a new trailer showing Han back prompt jokes about him dying five times. — Shea Serrano
Before Hobbs and Shaw, a small spin-off with "Galgado's" (as transcribed) character and Han in Europe is proposed, joked as a better move for her than Wonder Woman, along with wishes for mini-movies; Han and "Steve Yun" (as transcribed) of The Walking Dead are cited as Asian icons who were killed off. — Bill Simmons
