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Toy Soldiers

111 minutes

Cast

Selected cast credits · Film reference

Sean Astin Billy Tepper
Wil Wheaton Joey Trotta
Louis Gossett Jr. Dean Edward Parker
Keith Coogan Snuffy Bradberry
George Perez Ricardo Montoya
T.E. Russell Hank Giles
Shawn Phelan Yogurt
Knowl Johnson Phil Donoghue
Denholm Elliott Headmaster Gould
Jerry Orbach Albert Trotta
Andrew Divoff Luis Cali
Michael Champion Jack Thorpe
Jerry Valdez Jorge
Jesse Doran Enrique Cali
Mason Adams Otis Brown
R. Lee Ermey General Kramer
Richard Travis Frank Ingram
Stan Kelly Sheriff Role
Jeffrey Dawson Security Guard

Toy Soldiers | The Rewatchables

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What’s Aged the Best?

Astin’s athleticism; Wheaton’s accent and earring; opening; Yogurt; score; shooting reactions; plans; expulsion joke; phone-sex nostalgia

In the discussion (7)
Approx. transcript time · 00:09:58Read transcript
  • Wheaton’s inconsistent exaggerated New York accent and dangling earring supply unintentional comedy; the jewelry is corrected from a cross to an ankh.
  • Astin’s climbing, running, sliding and driving look impressively athletic, inspiring a hypothetical Billy–Rudy crossover.
  • Opening in Colombia and throwing a judge from a helicopter are enjoyable action conventions.
  • The judge’s flying robes, Yogurt’s name, Wheaton’s demeanor, the score and elaborate shooting-victim reactions are enjoyed.
  • The boys’ detailed intelligence folder and maps are impressively organized.
  • The Guinness-record expulsion joke recalls familiar action-film dialogue.
  • Phone-sex lines recall a period of scarce adult material and communal teenage curiosity.

Half-Assed Internet Research

Novel; budget; auditions; improvisation; locations; Yogurt nickname; careers; eighteen deaths

In the discussion (8)
Approx. transcript time · 00:11:54Read transcript
  • A feature reportedly said Wheaton wrote a character biography and watched The Godfather films; he recalled improvising the requested accent without studying a specific one.
  • The film is reported to adapt William P.Kennedy’s 1988 novel, directed by Beverly Hills Cop writer Daniel Petrie, with a $10 million budget and $15 million gross.
  • The banana-peel exchange was reportedly improvised and Gossett continued the scene.
  • Helicopter footage was reportedly filmed in San Antonio; the fictional Virginia school differs from the real Manhattan Regis.
  • Shawn Phelan reportedly acquired the Yogurt nickname after spilling yogurt in a van, and the film adopted it.
  • Petrie reportedly blamed the R rating for box-office trouble; Astin and Coogan knew each other growing up, and Astin had wanted the River Phoenix role in Stand by Me.
  • Coogan’s later career trouble is attributed in the cited research to a billing dispute and firing his agent after Don’t Tell Mom the Babysitter’s Dead.
  • The body count is corrected from a guess of 12 to 18.

Top Ten List

Die Hard villain scale: Rickman at ten; competing bottom rankings

In the discussion (4)
Approx. transcript time · 00:14:46Read transcript
  • A separate revised scale puts Powers Boothe at one, the Passenger 57 villain at two and the Toy Soldiers villain at three, reversing an earlier preference between Boothe and Toy Soldiers.
  • The villain scale initially puts the Toy Soldiers villain at one, criticizing his intimidation speech despite strong entrance, pivot and final-fight stages; a later utterance calls him two.
  • The stated ascending scale continues with Powers Boothe in Sudden Death at three, Willem Dafoe in Speed 2 at four, Dennis Hopper in Speed at five, John Lithgow in Cliffhanger at six, Tommy Lee Jones in Under Siege at seven, Ed Harris in The Rock at eight, Gary Oldman in Air Force One at nine and Alan Rickman’s Gruber at ten.
  • An alternate opinion places Jones at nine and would rank Lithgow and Hopper higher; Toy Soldiers is again called the worst while Boothe is another participant’s least favorite.

Most Rewatchable Scene

Roll call; Billy’s escape

In the discussion (15)
Approx. transcript time · 00:17:32Read transcript
  • Billy’s punishment with a metal rod briefly creates anxiety about how sadistic the scene will become.
  • The basement party establishes friendships through disguised mouthwash liquor, crude etiquette, radiator signals and a hacked phone-sex line overheard by the dean.
  • The first roll call establishes the hostages, including Ricardo revealing he understands Spanish and Billy lunging at the terrorists.
  • The roll-call intimidation is considered too weak; proposals include a frightened younger boy, more physical threats or displaying the murdered teacher.
  • Wheaton proposes making noise, drawing the terrorists inside and jumping them.
  • Joey’s angry attack after a mafia joke is unintentionally funny because his tiny punches do not match the others’ alarm.
  • Billy’s timed escape, return deadline and shower concealment create suspense; the dean’s sudden trust in a habitual troublemaker is questioned.
  • The gun firing up in the air is considered an authentic consequence of being unable to handle it.
  • Joey refuses release, curses his father and the captor, steals a weapon and is quickly killed.
  • A rewrite allowing Joey to hurt at least one terrorist would have made his final effort less pathetic while preserving the sad death.
  • Hank covering Billy’s mouth is funny but defended as preventing a dangerous outburst.
  • The model-plane payoff, search for Billy, reunion and abrupt helicopter-shot ending are enjoyed.
  • Roll call is one final favorite, especially the parents’ occupations and threat to kill five boys for each escape.
  • More fathers’ jobs are requested, including a sports anchor and football general manager.
  • Billy’s escape is the other final favorite.

Roger Ebert's review

In the discussion (1)
Approx. transcript time · 00:21:20Read transcript
  • Ebert’s one-star review and criticism of the gimmicks are rejected as unfair to the film’s inventive pleasures.

Probably Unanswerable Questions

Autumn setting; mafia-character scale

In the discussion (2)
Approx. transcript time · 00:22:57Read transcript
  • Soccer and the new school year suggest an early-autumn setting; the team’s record is jokingly guessed.
  • A loose mafia-character scale puts Jimmy Conway at ten, Sorvino’s Goodfellas character at nine, Sonny at eight and Albert Trotta around three-and-a-half or four; other examples and the genre’s resurgence are discussed.

Picking Nits

Vents; liquor strength; furniture; cigarette; phones; code; clothes; sewage; chest wound

In the discussion (10)
Approx. transcript time · 00:36:29Read transcript
  • The ceilings and vents are pristine and perfectly lit, without the rat droppings or cobwebs expected in an old school.
  • The inexperienced boys should be much drunker after the strong vodka mixture.
  • Moving the dean’s furniture and reproducing its exact arrangement outdoors would take enormous effort.
  • The unattended cigarette should extinguish before burning down far enough to ignite the matches.
  • The boys never revisit their established phone-tapping skills as a way to contact help.
  • The brief numerical code seems incapable of communicating which mafia son is being held.
  • The terrorists apparently bring no change of clothes for several days.
  • Billy’s sewage-soaked condition should undermine the claim that he has merely showered.
  • The lonely dean hanging up immediately on the phone-sex call is jokingly considered implausible.
  • Gossett’s character recovers implausibly quickly from a chest wound.

What’s Aged the Worst?

Communal pornography; technology; posters; henchman; Elliott; Orbach; female roles; fear; greetings

In the discussion (9)
Approx. transcript time · 00:44:48Read transcript
  • Group consumption of pornography seems strange to a younger participant.
  • The absence of internet and cell phones makes the premise conspicuously different today.
  • A Pogues poster seems inconsistent with the boys’ established personalities; a casual set-decoration choice is an alternative explanation.
  • The American henchman’s presence among Colombians is unexplained, with filing and counting jokingly treated as his specialist skills.
  • Elliott’s respected presence seems wasted on a headmaster who offers little leadership during the crisis.
  • Orbach’s uncredited, tiny part is puzzling and compared with his similarly small Out for Justice role.
  • The lack of female characters is criticized; mothers at the meeting are acknowledged, and a woman could play an FBI or school official.
  • The students’ relaxed games and banter lack believable fear, especially viewed after later school violence.
  • Awkward early-1990 s chest and elbow bumps are a late addition.

Dr. Richard Kimble Inappropriate Body Award

Hank; student compared with Mario Lopez; student doing sit-ups

In the discussion (1)
Approx. transcript time · 01:04:11Read transcript
  • Hank, the student described as a discount Mario Lopez, and an older-looking student doing sit-ups have improbably muscular bodies.

The Stephen A. Smith Hottest Take Award

Girls-school sequel; Riggs and Seagal hairstyles

In the discussion (2)
Approx. transcript time · 01:04:55Read transcript
  • A mid-1990 s girls-school sequel with Reese Witherspoon or Sarah Michelle Gellar is proposed.
  • The hero and villain hairstyles are compared with Martin Riggs and early Seagal, followed by other examples of the voluminous period cut.

Casting What-Ifs

Schlesinger; Astin’s audition; Feldman

In the discussion (3)
Approx. transcript time · 01:09:08Read transcript
  • Schlesinger reportedly left the directing assignment for Pacific Heights, a decision viewed favorably.
  • Coogan reportedly read opposite Astin during his strong audition after already being cast.
  • Feldman reportedly auditioned but was not in the right place; possible roles are debated, with a Billy version imagined as entertainingly disastrous.

Recasting Couch

DiCaprio as Yogurt; Bronx Tale lead as Joey; Leguizamo, Garcia, Bauer or Smits as Cali

In the discussion (3)
Approx. transcript time · 01:12:16Read transcript
  • DiCaprio could play Yogurt, but would be too young for Billy and would need an expanded role.
  • The young A Bronx Tale lead is again preferred as Joey.
  • Leguizamo, Garcia, Bauer and Smits are proposed as stronger villain options.

Apex Mountain

Cali’s actor, tentative; boarding-school hostage movies; judges thrown from helicopters; underwear bonding; cool educators

In the discussion (5)
Approx. transcript time · 01:17:10Read transcript
  • Astin, Gossett, Wheaton and Orbach are rejected; the actor playing Cali is tentatively the only performer at his peak.
  • Boarding-school hostage movies, judges thrown from helicopters and boys bonding in brief underwear are accepted.
  • Astin’s cut-off-shirt look is discussed as Double Dragon or old-Nintendo chic.
  • Gossett is proposed as a peak cool educator for his forgiving response to misbehavior.
  • Both educators’ forgiving attitude supports the cool-teacher nomination, with Mrs.Garrett offered as a competing example.

Producer review

Enthusiastic; strong premise and score; believable gun inexperience

In the discussion (2)
Approx. transcript time · 01:33:05Read transcript
  • The first-time review is enthusiastic about the plot, score and confined-location format, rejecting Ebert’s assessment.
  • Joey’s sudden death is surprising but respected for realistically showing an inexperienced gun user losing control.

More from the conversation

Mouthwash concealing alcohol and a Die Hard–Dead Poets Society–Red Dawn combination establish the appeal.
Approx. transcript time · 00:02:38Read transcript
The R-rated mixture of teenage vices and action is praised, with Astin convincing as an unusually physical leading man.
Approx. transcript time · 00:03:48Read transcript
Years of cable viewing reveal additional comic details, including the minor character Yogurt.
Approx. transcript time · 00:05:45Read transcript
Boarding-school films offer a contained, appealing pre-college world; more ordinary school-life scenes would have been welcome.
Approx. transcript time · 00:06:18Read transcript
The hostage premise is considered plausible, with the terrorists adapting after the judge’s son has left; the American accomplice’s efficient filing becomes a joke.
Approx. transcript time · 00:07:29Read transcript
Privileged boys resenting their fathers contrast with a terrorist acting from devotion to his father.
Approx. transcript time · 00:08:54Read transcript
Orbach’s mafia appearance and the familiar young cast add appeal.
Approx. transcript time · 00:09:23Read transcript
The supporting boys’ looks and chemistry are liked despite poorly remembered character names.
Approx. transcript time · 00:12:48Read transcript
The villain evokes Terry Silver and Scarface; a prior ranking is revised to Powers Boothe 1, Passenger 57 villain 2 and Toy Soldiers villain 3.
Approx. transcript time · 00:14:05Read transcript
Jones’s Under Siege performance is connected with Andrew Davis casting him in The Fugitive.
Approx. transcript time · 00:19:03Read transcript
Public objections to earlier criticism of Boothe and Teen Wolf’s Boof lead to a joke about disliking both.
Approx. transcript time · 00:19:33Read transcript
Microchips lead to memories of exaggerated childhood fears of quicksand and downed power lines, plus a joking quicksand-movie pitch.
Approx. transcript time · 00:47:45Read transcript
The repeated brief-underwear scenes are discussed as a conspicuous period choice, with heat and casual male friendship suggested as intentions.
Approx. transcript time · 01:01:18Read transcript
The Richard Kimble award name is praised through recollection of The Fugitive’s injection scene.
Approx. transcript time · 01:04:26Read transcript
Just One of the Guys is proposed for a future episode, with unusually strong praise for Billy Jacoby; Soul Man is contrasted as already objectionable in its own era.
Approx. transcript time · 01:07:56Read transcript
Gossett’s talent is considered underserved by the roles available in his era.
Approx. transcript time · 01:20:00Read transcript
Astin’s Goonies, Rudy and Lord of the Rings roles begin a case for his acting Hall of Fame status.
Approx. transcript time · 01:30:25Read transcript
Stranger Things,24 and Like Father Like Son extend the Astin career case, with sports analogies suggesting a credible but disputed Hall of Fame candidacy.
Approx. transcript time · 01:31:32Read transcript
Future action-film episodes and a Chicago live show are discussed without identifying the latter film.
Approx. transcript time · 01:36:37Read transcript