Top Ten List
Life lessons from Goodfellas
- 1 Don't whack a made man
- 2 After a massive heist, don't buy anything fancy, lay low
- 3 Whenever you need money, rob an airport
- 5 Don't make a mob boss your silent restaurant partner
- 6 Don't use coke if you're also selling coke
- 7 If you really hate someone, shoot them in the face (no open casket)
- 8 Never rat on your friends, always keep your mouth shut
- 9 If your new boyfriend pistol-whips someone in front of you, don't end up with him
- 10 If you're part of a crew, nobody ever tells you they're going to kill you
In the discussion (12)
Approx. transcript time · 00:29:08Read transcript
- The segment is introduced as the ten best lessons from Goodfellas, with the list deferred until after an ad break. — Bill Simmons
- Lesson number one is not to kill a made man. — Bill Simmons
- After a large heist, the advice is to avoid buying anything conspicuous and to lie low. — Bill Simmons
- Another lesson says to rob an airport when money is needed. — Chris Ryan
- The machine transcript jumps from lesson number one to an explicit lesson number five; no fourth ordinal is inferred. — Bill Simmons
- Lesson number five is not to make a mob boss a silent restaurant partner because the partner will steal from the business and ultimately destroy it. — Bill Simmons
- A later lesson says not to use cocaine while also selling cocaine. — Bill Simmons
- If someone is going to be murdered, the list grimly advises preventing an open-casket funeral. — Bill Simmons
- The list repeats the rule never to inform on friends and always to keep quiet. — Bill Simmons
- Seeing a new boyfriend assault someone is offered as a reason not to remain with him. — Bill Simmons
- A crew member is warned that nobody announces a plan to kill them. — Bill Simmons
- A bonus lesson advises against divorce and says to make the relationship work.